Monday, August 22, 2011

Ski School (1990)

“What the hell is this mountain coming to? Half naked girls walking around at 9:30 in the morning? Last year they were completely naked by 9:30 in the morning!”

The Story:

When John (Tom Bresnahan) enrols in Ski School, a competition ran and almost always won by wunderkind lowlife Reid Janssens (Mark Thomas Miller), he’s given the team of section 8, a carefree bunch of party animals and losers whom aren’t part of any official team’s entry. Running afoul of Reid quickly due to his natural talent, John is the best skier and the biggest womanizer in the section, managing to bed a sweet little blonde he may or may not have feelings for and a new face on the mountain; a leggy, tanned babe with huge cans. After being disqualified from the events due to their unprofessional behavior, the crazy 8 decide to crash the championship in a bevy of beer, babes and balloons. When the audience chants, “let them ski!”, Reid and his investors have a decision to make. Piss off the people, or settle this once and for all.

The Review:

The first Canadian titty comedy of the 90s involves more goofball humor and elaborate pranks than ones that came before it, but the results are mixed. On one hand, the killer ski action is some of the best I’ve seen and the zenith race actually tops the Chinese downhill in Hot Dog, even if it isn't funnier as a whole. Loaded with big, fake breasts, but low on actual raunch factor, Ski School gets most of its laughs from Dave (Dean Cameron), who is the Shakespeare reciting, official teacher of section 8 and the cause of most hijinx. While the character is funny in small doses and at times gut-busting, you just get the impression that he’s trying way too hard. Not nearly as hard as dickhead Reid, who sits alone in a hot tub with a team mate talking about how everyone wants to be around them while all their girls are partying with Section 8.

Section 8 sure does like to party, though, swigging back Labatt’s any chance they get and creating havoc to their rival squad; going so far as to get John’s blonde to coerce two of the guys on their team to say sexually suggestive phrases on hidden cameras, editing the videos together and culminating it all in each guy thinking they’re going to wind up in bed with the girl, but inevitably end up with each other. This is screened during a proud Reid’s skiing tape being played at a bar and means these two are going to be getting the brunt of the gay jokes until credits roll. Section 8 has a tendency to yell “party!” and one just breaks out, but the typical debauchery that should ensue is never really explored. They wake up with no memory, they wake up beside random chicks, but for all we know, they got drunk and watched Star Wars with them. Actually, that probably did happen knowing these guys.

The great thing about teen comedies, sex, pizza and alcohol is even if they're not great, they’re still pretty boss, and Ski School is light hearted fun that would easily put a smirk on your face channel surfing. Even cut to full frame, the cinematography is something out of a kaleidoscope with colourful deep reds, blues and pink clothing, goggles and ski pants standing out across soft, white snow, shining sun and huge mountains. Room 8 is basically a disgusting mess covered up with more vibrant cocktail signs, patio lights, skis and unfathomably, women. Ski School has earned its place among the heavies of the snowbound flicks. Like all good titty comedies should, it features a topless broad less than a minute in. You don’t forget things like that. (Brett H.)

Tale of the Tape:

6 out of a possible 10 inches.

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